Valentine's Day

Since Valentine's Day, I have wanted to write down some of the thoughts I've had as I think back over the past several days. We had the opportunity to hear Fran Sciacca, perhaps one of the best teachers we've ever heard, at a conference this past weekend. [If you would like to know more about him or his ministry check out his website, handsofhur.org. You can download the sessions and the handout. There's a lot of great material there and most of it is free:] He was addressing a young audience, mostly college age and single, but several couples from our community group got to hear him. He speaks with the wisdom of experience and with humility. I wanted to write down everything he said! I'll try to write the nuggets I took away. It was not your typical how-to-make-your-marriage-work. First he talked about our perceptions and how they are shaped by our perspective. He talked about how our satisfaction in life and relationships depends on the gap between what I think I should get and what I actually get. The phrase he used was "Satisfaction (or happiness) is the child of met expectations." My husband and I learned very early in our marriage about expectations from a wise couple just a few years ahead of us. We all have expectations about what our spouse should do; how they behave and respond to us. The problem arises when our "list" of expectations is not the same as their "list". A husband or wife may think they are doing pretty good according to their own list but they may be failing according to their spouse's list. Solution: sit down together and compare lists; you may be surprised. Unrealistic expectations are such an enemy and so widely perpetuated in our culture. He spoke at length about how our culture so influences our perspective, even as believers. His answer was not a new prescription for seeing things but new eyes! Using the filter of scripture to view marriage and not the ones our culture uses; things like arrogance, apathy, anger and acclimation rather than awe. My favorite part of his teaching was his reminder that marriage is the single most effective tool (not the only one) that God uses to sanctify us, or to use his words "to make us less like Adam and more like Christ". If we ever can get that it is not all about "me" and "my happiness" (what!!) but instead about God and his holiness we will be on the right path. God desires intimacy with us and for us with our spouses. Fran said that intimacy does not just happen. Sex may but intimacy does not. It requires time and effort . I will end with this quote from him, "Learn to talk the way the heart (of your spouse) listens." Maybe more later after I mull over all he said. This is just a bit from about five hours of his teaching.

a recipe to share

I want to share some recipes in my blog so I thought this was a good one to start. I got the original recipe at a cookie exchange when my older children were preschool age (at least twenty years ago!) but I have modified it over the years. One of my dear friends says these are her favorites so I try to make them for her birthday. I just made them for her and a couple of other friends whose birthdays we were celebrating a couple of weeks ago and for a diaper shower we had at our Bible study last week. They are chewy, brownie-like and as they bake they crackle so that no two are alike...thus the name

Chocolate Snowflakes

2 c. sugar
3/4 c. cocoa ( I use regular unsweetened cocoa with a couple of tablespoons of dutch-process cocoa)
1/2 c. vegetable oil
1/4 c. butter, melted
2 c. all-purpose flour
1/2 tsp. salt
2 tsp. baking powder
3/4 c. powdered sugar, sifted

Combine the first four ingredients in a large mixing bowl; beat at medium speed of an electric mixer until blended. Add eggs and vanilla, mixing well. Combine flour, salt and baking powder. Add about 1/4 of dry ingredients at a time to chocolate mixture, mixing well after each addition. Cover and chill for at least 2 hours. Shape dough into 1-inch balls and roll in powdered sugar. wire racks. Place cookies 2 inches apart on greased cookie sheets. Bake at 350° for 10-12 minutes. Don't over bake! Cool on wire racks. This will make about 8 dozen very small cookies, great for teas and lady-parties.
[If you prefer to make the balls a bit larger, 1 1/2 inch balls, you will have about 6 dozen. The ones pictured are about this size.]

naming my blog

So in case you wonder about the blog title I have to confess that the idea came from C. S. Lewis. I have many authors but He is my favorite. I was re-reading his address entitled "The Weight of Glory" a while back and was reminded of what he says about our spiritual longings. He speaks of how we long for something that seems elusive; he writes about how we usually notice a particular feeling " just as the moment of vision dies away, as the music ends, or as the landscape loses the celestial light". He goes on to write about "the bitterness which mixes with the sweetness of that message is due to the fact that it so seldom seems to be a message intended for us, but rather something we have overheard". In another of his quotes from a source I have yet to locate, he says"If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world." My husband has been reading Randy Acorn's Heaven and finished another couple of his novels over the past few months. We have talked quite a bit about some of the concepts he presents in those books. They remind me of many of C. S. Lewis's ideas concerning heaven. From time to time we catch a glimpse of what it may be like in the next world for a fleeting second and it is as though we have overheard something so wonderful we can't put it into words. The past several years of my life I think I've only begun to recognize those moments for what they are. I know as I get older I think more about eternity and things eternal. It's the idea that God has "set eternity in the hearts of men"(Ecclesiastes 3:11 NIV) But I am quickly brought back to the here and now with all the pressing, urgent matters that must be attended. I so desire to live in the here and now with a view toward those things that will remain forever: the triune God; His word, and the souls of people. I think that writing my thoughts helps me to put life into the right perspective. I hope that as I share some of those thoughts on my blog that you will be encouraged in the same way. These are the lyrics to a recent song release by a band called Downhere that put many of my feelings about this into words.


My Last Amen (by Marc Martel & Jason Germain)

From the corner of my eye
There's a tear I'm trying to cry
But the feeling can't be found
Like a note thrills in a song
When I play it again, it's gone
'Cause it was never in the sound

And it keeps me wanting
That mysterious thing
Like a night is waiting for a dawn

Every prayer I say (a little closer)
To my resting place (a little closer)
Where my final breath is the beginning
To never needing
And I will find my last Amen

I could swear I have two hearts
One to stay, one to depart
This sad, tragic kingdom
And it burns me down to the core
Because I know there's so much more
It's just a pale reflection
And it keeps me wanting
That mysterious thing
Like an outcast waiting to belong

And while the thrills are fading The joy is in the waiting
Somewhere in the grand design It's good be unsatisfied It keeps the faith and hope a little more alive

Marc Martel writes that the inspiration for this song came from an old hymn called "The Lost Chord". You can read more at http://mylastamen.wordpress.com/my-last-amen/
or listen at
http://www.downhere.com/

Venturing into Cyberspace

I've been thinking about blogging for most of the last year...so now I'm finally doing it. Why did I wait so long to begin? If you spoke to my family, those who know me best; they would say I have difficulty making decisions. ME? Of course, they're right. I was somewhat inspired and encouraged when I saw "Julie and Julia" several months ago. You know when she says " I could write a blog; I have thoughts." I definitely have thoughts but putting them on the web is a little intimidating for me.

I love being a wife and a mom and after thirty-one years of marriage and almost twenty-six years of being someone's mom I have quite a lot of thoughts about both! I love being with younger women and trying to encourage them during the early years of marriage and motherhood. I love spending time with older women who have already been where I am and trying to glean some wisdom from their experience. I enjoy friends who are in a similar phase of life; that would be mid-life. Those years where children are still at home or in college and the empty nest is fast approaching, parents are aging and need more attention and care. Those years when your hormones kick into overdrive and you learn why all the fuss about a little hot flash. (So you get a little hot, what's the big deal; right?)

I want to share some of the things I've learned along the way and some of the things I'm learning now. I want to share some of the great wisdom I've received from others; some personal friends and some who I only know through their writings. Hopefully, the things I share here will honor Christ. I want to convey how short I fall of His standard but also how generous His grace is in my life. Our goal in our home is to live what we say we believe.

I love to read so I'm constantly talking and thinking about what I'm reading and I also love to cook. Baking is my passion in the kitchen. Sometimes I do wish for a staff like those on the Food Network shows so that all I have to do is the fun part.

I like to be organized but I've relaxed my own standards in that area to the relief of my family and for my own mental health. Cleaning and organizing are sometimes therapeutic for me but our house is very lived-in with lots of "stuff". I'll write more later about the interests and hobbies of my family to give you a glimpse of all of their books, computers, video systems, guitars, amps, keyboards, etc. etc. etc.

I look forward to writing here and sharing with anyone who happens to read. More later and I'll explain how I chose the title for my blog.

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